Foster Care and Adoption, Parenting , , , , ,

Before I adopted my kids I would have never thought it to be possible to love a child that I didn’t birth as equally as I did the ones I did. For some people, it may not be possible;But for me it is. Is it a different love? In the beginning it may have been but now there is literally no difference other than the fact that I long for the time before I knew them. I wish that it was me that birthed them. I wish I was there through all of their cute stages. I wish I was there to protect them from all of their pain.

In the same regard, the people they are today is because they were able to experience something different and painful. So now they have seen both sides and know who they want to be. They don’t take the life they have now for granted. They both look back at the life they left behind, and feel sad for the people still living it. They have moments of frustration because “what should have been” didn’t work out. But they both feel like they wouldn’t be where they are today, if they hadn’t been removed from it.

My struggles come when their biological mother, surfaces and tries to drag them back under. I said tries. They do not want a life of drug addiction, poverty and loneliness. But it still hurts them to have the reminder. And that is what hurts me. I hate to see them hurting. So is the love different? Yes, its more complex, but it is just as great.